One of the draft posts that I had written in summer 2012. Still relevant to me.
Here it goes –
I had trouble coping with certain issues in past couple of months. I had never felt so out of control since 1998; but back then I was an insane teenager, on a self-destructive mission trying to establish that I was a grown up. Pretty normal! Well, obviously that did not go very well. Anyway, I would wake up everyday hoping that the day just ran past quickly. I really had no clue why I felt so depressed. I would hate meeting people or going out altogether. I would get irritated for no apparent reason and refuse to eat all day. I am sure this happens to a lot of people out there.
Friends around me were facing problems and people at work had serious issues. There seemed to be a strange sense of sadness all around me. No matter how much I tried to keep myself happy, it just wouldn’t work. And I was not happy about being unhappy. I was so fed up with my behavior that I was in-fact considering seeking professional help. Some sessions of psychiatric counseling perhaps.
When all I could see was darkness all around, how exactly was I to walk myself towards the light? Actually, I could, I just had to listen to myself. In the rush of life, I had forgotten about me. And I was going to realize that very soon.
We have non-stop communication channels which keep feeding us information all the time – cell phones, social media, news, TV, radio, online conversations and what not. I wonder how many people actually take time out for themselves and do nothing. No matter how busy one is, it is important to listen to what we really want. And most times its best to take our own advice. Very few avoid giving advice even when asked. Most of us have so many opinion on so many things that we constantly feel the urge to share it with the world. But we fail to listen to it ourselves.
What we need to understand is that it is okay to feel bad, it is alright to feel disappointed and lost. It is okay to reach out to your loved ones for help. We humans cannot be perfect all the time. What matters is how brave we are. Next time you feel low or disappointed listen to yourself. Try to think of what you would advice someone else in your place and do the same for yourself. Even grown-ups cant outgrow their emotions!